LIFE BETWEEN THE LINES

Yay. I’m through the fast.

5 day fast mimicking diet afterglow.

‘Olly olly oxen free!

It was good. The fast was good.

Physically, I lost 5 pounds. I ‘feel’ lighter, thinner. I’ve got incentive to continue really thinking about what I’m eating and doing. Being mindful. That’s what I ‘intend’ to be.

I did wake with a sore neck and nightmares that were loosely based on one of the events that has been bugging me. So mentally – ‘someone’s got some ‘splainin’ to do!!!’

STOP IT.

Constructively, I think two things about this:

  1. Get a new pillow.
  2. Get some therapy.
  3. HA

Actually,

2. Obviously, these things are still bugging me. At least the one.

3. Old No. 2. may not be such a bad idea.

4. I think I’m on to something with the ‘be in the moment’ thing.

Yesterday, I gave a lot of thought to that idea of being in/staying in the moment. I actually did it, I practiced it. And it helped in all instances. I did see forward motion, if not resolution.

I spoke my mind in the moment with regard to two of the events. I followed my heart with the third.

Being in the ‘now’ and not the ‘then’ really changes things. The past anger is not a part of the equation when I speak and act truthfully in the now.

ANYWAY…..

(I remember someone in grad school telling me that’a great conversation starter.)

“Anyway,…”

I journaled this morning.

It was so great.

I feel lighter just sitting down to journal, knowing I will feel better than I did, when I am through.

Blogging, you can’t name names.

Journaling, I can read them the riot act for what they did, or at least ‘give it a name.’

My journaling today started out as blog notes and a grocery list. But that’s a good warm up.

Today what bubbled up as I was journaling was a host of all these random individual memories that came flooding back from all these different times in my life. And by Page Three, I began to consider that just like the memories, these issues that are a struggle now, will be just blips on the screen before I know it. I know they seem immeasurably significant now, but….

Hard right turn.

All five of my senses are heightened as a result of the fast. I could smell the neighbors frying bacon yesterday morning. And everything tastes sooo good.

Oh, dig this – we were exposed to COVID.

HO, didn’t see that one coming, did ya?

Good thing fasting regenerates the immune system.

SO

while we wait for our saliva lab test to arrive for our ‘fifth day after exposure or later’ test, it’s like I’ve been gifted another week’s reprieve from regular life.

Life between the lines…

WITH food.

It’s all a gift, isn’t it? The chance to be here. To think these thoughts. Toil in these struggles.

‘Separate the wheat from the chaff.’

What am I trying to say…? I feel refreshed, even though I am still very tired. I feel hope, even though I am still concerned about some things.

I got better at the self care thing, didn’t I?

I feel like I broke a pattern in which I was trapped. And I feel I have a plan to move forward.

AND I’m going to do yoga right after I finish here.

AND

eat.

Geez, what a great fast.

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